Nightmare Alley is nightmarishly boring

I don’t like Guillermo Del Toro. So my review may be biased. But I don’t even shoot for unbiased, objective opinions. You can read it on IMDB, Lettrboxd or Metacritic.

Nightmare Alley is an insanely boring, unimaginative and stupid film. I rarely have such a killing desire to leave the theatre asap. There’s nothing new in here. And he managed to screw up having Cate Blanchett on his cast.

The film tries soooo fuckin hard to be a metaphor-filled tale about the 7 sins and the demise of a human that it just comes off as just pretentious as fuck. This movie could’ve just as well been in black and white to come full circle in its “deep, not like others” strive.

Ford v Ferrari is just as long as Nightmare Alley, but Ford feels like an hour (that’s how entertaining it is) and Nightmare feels like 10 hours of a real nightmare. Del Toro loves vanilla storylines combined with pretentious arthouse-y horror stylistics. But he lacks screenwriting skills or even skills to approve a good screenplay.

The last 10–15 minutes of film comes full circle in exploring the 7 sins and has some good moments but they are by far not worth the money or the time and there’s nothing you don’t know already. Just rewatch Se7en, jesus!